Dear friends and readers of my blog,
so much activity in the air! Such a busy time. Often hectic.
Is this why we are here?
When there has been a peak of events, a turbulence of happenings, when there was a storm, whether solar or planetary, regarding weather or geomagnetism, or something else, I always happen to go deep. Into the center of it all. Because in the fast-forward motion I recognize the eternal Source. Paradoxically.
So naturally I investigate deeper, digging into truth or - when a situation has become so exaggerated - I see the hilarious humor of all of it, the "movie" of existence and ask myself, how serious this all truly is.
In these moments I question also the event of ascension to be essential and consider it to be just a play in consciousness. Nothing Ultimate really.
Who did create me anyway, me, who has to experience all of that? Do I really like all of this? REALLY? Ultimately and forever?
And my answer is a clear "no".
Sorry, I do not want to upset anybody as I dare to say this so openly. Is she a heretic? A killjoy? - perhaps you ask.
But I am anyway going "back" to the one who created me. I have to. Would he/she be angry with me as I do not appreciate their creation, which appears to be a separation from Source?
Honestly, what is so special about anything we experience, what is so special about any experience, if it is only transitional and does not carry the sign of eternity, of undying happiness?
So as I go backwards the "tunnel" toward the creator, to find out whether he/she feels insulted by me, I find that there is no other creator than myself, - while observing things they come into existence.
The whole creator myth is just that: a myth. There is no 'other' who said one day: dear one, now I am going to create you. And then there I was! Not only separated from the creator but also from Source.
But it is true, it is still a miracle how things come into existence. How the first cell multiplies itself.
So how go I "back" to the Source? (In reality there is no "tunnel" and no "going back". This is just another illusion of the tricky and sweet Goddess Maya.)
There is a hole in the universe, this is a spot in the heart, connected to the 3th eye, or better to the pineal gland and above, and which is the doorway to infinity, to the freedom from all that arises. It is the doorway to the Eternal Source.
A lid has been taken once off my encapsulated existence, as I incarnated here, which gives me the view beyond the "backpack" and creation of restricted consciousness, in which everything is mirrored back at infinity and therefore repeats itself at infinity.
Don't know why we once slipped all into this backpack of multiple creations without knowing how to remember the way out. It is our true Self, our I AM is carrying this backpack. Inside the backpack there is not really Divine Light, only reflected light. And who's existence is determined in this bag of darkness, cannot know what is beyond or prior: true Freedom.
Ahh, freedom from all these happenings and events who are nothing but distractions from that freedom! Because what is this truly all about? Even if it is said: this ascension is a new adventure! Well, new only because ingredients and composition have changed. Now we will experience a new mixture. Still though bound to the wheel of repetition of some kind. Much more happiness there? Much more perfection there? Yes, the backpack will become a bit more translucent, but still: it is a backpack, I AM carrying. So what about ultimate and unshakable happiness and perfection? Backpack-free.
A position from where There Is Only Light. And not just colored light! Radiant, Bright Light, in which "even the rainbow dies".
I feel this tiredness about all these colors. It is not ultimate joy. How many times and how long did I experience them? As long as I want more, it is not yet the last destination.
Now if I am the creator myself, Who AM I? I cannot just be the function of a backpack. There must be more freedom than that. I must be the One Who is senior to that bag and what is this bag anyway?
It is the prison of mind. Nothing wrong about mind, but not to be able to get beyond it, it is a prison, not to be able to recognize that we are still captured in mind, even if very subtle and beautiful, this is imprisonment. The endless spinning of worlds after worlds. Is it yet beautiful enough? Should we not ascend further? Should we be not more powerful? Should our life not be even more fulfilling?
Yes, the search!
But as the lid is off - which I never can put back where it once was - I see that Radiant Source which is my own true Being. And it is the mind that contains all universes. All the creator gods are contained in it, and they are all part of our hidden omni-consciousness. But we are used to project them all outwardly.
|Salzburg: Dome of the Kajetaner Church|
And the Divine is our true Home, our true Essence. Then all the creations occur. Now most of us have chosen to dwell in a backpack, which will soon have a transparent coating, a state which we call "ascension".
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