Thursday, March 8, 2012

Personal Update: The Hole in the Universe


Dear friends and readers of my blog

so much activity in the air! Such a busy time. Often hectic.
Is this why we are here?

When there has been a peak of events, a turbulence of happenings, when there was a storm, whether solar or planetary, regarding weather or geomagnetism, or something else, I always happen to go deep. Into the center of it all. Because in the fast-forward motion I recognize the eternal Source. Paradoxically.

So naturally I investigate deeper, digging into truth or - when a situation has become so exaggerated - I see the hilarious humor of all of it, the "movie" of existence and ask myself, how serious this all truly is. 

In these moments I question also the event of ascension to be essential and consider it to be just a play in consciousness. Nothing Ultimate really. 

Who did create me anyway, me, who has to experience all of that? Do I really like all of this? REALLY? Ultimately and forever?
And my answer is a clear "no". 

Sorry, I do not want to upset anybody as I dare to say this so openly. Is she a heretic? A killjoy? - perhaps you ask.

But I am anyway going "back" to the one who created me. I have to. Would he/she be angry with me as I do not appreciate their creation, which appears to be a separation from Source?  

Honestly, what is so special about anything we experience, what is so special about any experience, if it is only transitional and does not carry the sign of eternity, of undying happiness?

So as I go backwards the "tunnel" toward the creator, to find out whether he/she feels insulted by me, I find that there is no other creator than myself, - while observing things they come into existence. 

The whole creator myth is just that: a myth. There is no 'other' who said one day: dear one, now I am going to create you. And then there I was! Not only separated from the creator but also from Source. 

But it is true, it is still a miracle how things come into existence. How the first cell multiplies itself. 

So how go I "back" to the  Source? (In reality there is no "tunnel" and no "going back". This is just another illusion of the tricky and sweet Goddess Maya.)

There is a hole in the universe, this is a spot in the heart, connected to the 3th eye, or better to the pineal gland and above, and which is the doorway to infinity, to the freedom from all that arises. It is the doorway to the Eternal Source. 

A lid has been taken once off my encapsulated existence, as I incarnated here, which gives me the view beyond the "backpack" and creation of restricted consciousness, in which everything is mirrored back at infinity and therefore repeats itself at infinity. 

Don't know why we once slipped all into this backpack of multiple creations without knowing how to remember the way out. It is our true Self, our I AM is carrying this backpack. Inside the backpack there is not really Divine Light, only reflected light. And who's existence is determined in this bag of darkness, cannot know what is beyond or prior: true Freedom. 

Ahh, freedom from all these happenings and events who are nothing but distractions from that freedom! Because what is this truly all about? Even if it is said: this ascension is a new adventure! Well, new only because ingredients and composition have changed. Now we will experience a new mixture. Still though bound to the wheel of repetition of some kind. Much more happiness there? Much more perfection there? Yes, the backpack will become a bit more translucent, but still: it is a backpack, I AM carrying. So what about ultimate and unshakable happiness and perfection? Backpack-free.

A position from where There Is Only Light. And not just colored light! Radiant, Bright Light, in which "even the rainbow dies".

I feel this tiredness about all these colors. It is not ultimate joy. How many times and how long did I experience them? As long as I want more, it is not yet the last destination.

Now if I am the creator myself, Who AM I? I cannot just be the function of a backpack. There must be more freedom than that. I must be the One Who is senior to that bag and what is this bag anyway?

It is the prison of mind. Nothing wrong about mind, but not to be able to get beyond it, it is a prison, not to be able to recognize that we are still captured in mind, even if very subtle and beautiful, this is imprisonment. The endless spinning of worlds after worlds. Is it yet beautiful enough? Should we not ascend further? Should we be not more powerful? Should our life not be even more fulfilling? 

Yes, the search! 

But as the lid is off - which I never can put back where it once was - I see that Radiant Source which is my own true Being. And it is the mind that contains all universes. All the creator gods are contained in it, and they are all part of our hidden omni-consciousness. But we are used to project them all outwardly. 

Salzburg: Dome of the Kajetaner Church
I have an image in my mind of some paintings in baroque churches in Europe. Some have in the apex of the dome either a void, sky-blue circle, or an opening to the sunlight, shining from above. Around this apex the rest of the worlds is colorfully and vividly arranged. Like this one which is the dome of a church in Austria. 

In a similar way we are this pristine and untouched consciousness of Pure Radiant Light, and all our creations appear "around" It- so to speak, while the Divine dwells in the Heart of all beings and things. 
 And the Divine is our true Home, our true Essence.  Then all the creations occur. Now most of us have chosen to dwell in a backpack, which will soon have a transparent coating, a state which we call "ascension". 

So are we ascending to that Divine Radiant Heart, bit by bit, or ARE we always already that Heart? Or do we even need "portals" to slip through into another reality-backpack? And who is "better" in doing what?

While we are doing this bit by bit thing, we are artfully separating ourselves from that One Radiant Center, slipping in all kinds of backpacks and theaters, cosmic events, oh, and other star civilizations and universes, but they all are still grouping around in the dome, - around the apex - pretending hierarchies of worlds and gods and consciousnesses, all still separated in a sense from one another. Because an entity is still "another", only in that One Radiant Consciousness everyone Is One.

In reality, we are all of these worlds. But we cannot think it, it would separate us again. We must realize it. It has to do with the Realization of that Light in the apex of the dome. From there we can see, that there is only Light and all that arises is a modification of that One Light. Then our Identity is not split in parts of casual choices. We Are the Heart of all things and worlds and beings.

This Radiant Heart is Humanity. And if you say, and if I say, I AM Humanity, we all are right, because it is the Divine Conscious and Radiant Heart that is our True and Undying Identity. It has just taken many bodies, but all these bodies only have this One Consciousness in common, it is our very Home.

Therefore I am not content with Ascension alone, my dear friends. Yes, it is a stepping up and an end to this dark illusion here, but it is not an end in and of itself, as much as all the hierarchical structures and beings and worlds to desire are not an end in and of itself. This is a nice kaleidoscope as far as I can see.

Do you remember how long you happened to look into such a toy? After a while of "ahh's" and "wow's" and other wonders and surprises, you got tired. 

Well, I have looked now for so long into such a thing. So often I have put it away, and then I looked again, into a different one. There was still curiosity. The latest one was the ascension kaleidoscope. 

I put it down now. At least for now. There is a place in the heart which is the hole in the universe. I take a bit of a rest right there. 

Much love and blessings,
Copyright©. All rights reserved: Ute Posegga-Rudel, 2012
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Alakh Niranjan said...

Yes, by this it was said all that was really needed!
The "Ascension" is not the Final-Realisation-of-The-Goal. It is just the Process within this our relativistic reality - within the Dualistic view at the world and reality at all. That is not our the final destination and the "end of the job", but we need to reach the Source itself! So, although, just infront of us, unstoppable comes "Something" really Divine, something we couldnot even dreem about, we must not be fully satisfied with it or with reaching of any particular goal, until we reach The Ultimate Goal. - The more and more of happiness on this our journey is quite OK., but we have to be aware that it all is nothing but only the pale reflection of True Happiness and Bliss that awaits us at the End of the journey: inside the Realm of our Source! End, actually - IT does not something that "need to be happen" in our future (although it seems to us like that) but the real point is the realisation of such (TRUE) consciousness in which we have crystalline "insight" that we are, ALWAYS, just Within-the-Source and that we have NEVER been really separated from It. And not even that, but: we ARE the Source Itself, and there is not other "God" except the Man. It IS The Supreme Creator of all that is, of all (own) Universe! ...As long as there is the illusion of the "Linear flow of time", we will always look to the Aim somewhere "ahead" of us - and will never be HERE and NOW. But, The Aim is, just, there - in the "Centre of the Universe": in this "little" space in the middle of our own Heart. Just there, and nowhere else, is the "Hole" - the real "Portal" - that is our Porch toward eternity and infinity, toward the Being of the Universe: toward our TRUE BEING.
So, all we need, at all, is not to "achieve" something in the future, but to realise the AWARENESS - awareness of the TRUTH, of our own Divinity, of All-That-Is. All we really need is: to WAKE UP!!!

Thank you dear Ute for all you do, and for all you are.
Peace and Bliss to you and to everybody!

Rosanna said...

Dear Ute,I read your words and they reflected many of the things I have been feeling,I think we have entered the reality of 5D and for my part I am looking around a little bit lost, here are some of my understandings: there is no meaning to anything apart from the meaning we give things.Another thing I have understood is that we are at a zero point which is a point where we are in front of all possibilities ,for my part I have been a little bit lazy waiting for duality to push me one way or another,hoping for the best, coping with what came along,but now is the time to climb up the 5d ladder which takes us from 0 to infinity if we turn the key of creation,which is the simplest of keys as you said through the portal of the heart, all the rest was embellishment ,talk and others telling us what to do. With much love Rosanna

Ute Shan'A'Maa said...

Dear Niranjan,yes, wouldn't it much more fun to "experience" a higher dimension from the position of the Ultimate - if indeed we would then still desire to experience something which is separated, even with a thin veil from the Source. Anyway, we are becoming what we are meditating on.

Ute Shan'A'Maa said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Ute Shan'A'Maa said...

Dear Rosanna,thank you for sharing your heart. The hole in the universe, as I am referring to, is pointing to the Source That is prior to all and any dimensions. Dimensions are dimensions of mind. We are not obliged to create when we are able to "look through that hole" and understand the game. The very Wise Ones say that the Universe is not necessary. Perhaps this answers some of your questions and makes things more clear. Many blessings! on Personal Update: The Hole in the Universe

Anonymous said...

Dear Ute, thank you once again for sharing your heart and your personal experience as of the moment. Honestly, I may say that I am becoming used to the many similarities I personally experience in regard to your experiences, haha. That in itself gives me much joy, for I am able to see my reflection in you in the most gracious of ways. That, however, is a rare gift which I gratefully accept and only experience with you.

It is like I'm listening to my heart when reading your sharings. In fact, I believe that's what is very much the case and for that I am grateful.

Thank you again for sharing this part of me in you!

Love to you!

Ute Shan'A'Maa said...

Dear Bernd, as we said! :) Blessings <3